March 3, 2011

Changes

It's been a while since I last posted, and a lot has happened.

I have determined that this is the year of changes, and I hate change. I think it upsets my OCD because it honestly makes me a little panicky. I have a set schedule and system, that I happen to like and I'm not really a fan of messing with it.

Even so change is inevitable and this year seems to be my year.

The first change is my upcoming graduation. I can't believe that in April I will be officially done school. As exciting as this is, its a little scary. I have never been completely done school. I have taken years off, but always with the knowledge that I'm going back. This time I don't have that option. I have completed four years of a university program and if that can't get me a full time job then so be it.

This leads me to the other big change of recent. I have worked at my current part time job for almost 8 years. This means that I am not even close to prepared to start searching for a new job. I have no resume, no cover letter, no interview experience. Nothing. On top of this, my current boss and I have gotten to the point where we literally have no relationship. I don't talk to her, she doesn't talk to me and when we do talk it almost always leads to some kind of an altercation. It had gotten so bad after Christmas that I was maybe getting 4 hours a week and they were almost always a closing shift. It all came down to me being extremely unhappy and dissatisfied with the situation that I was in. My mother runs her own bookkeeping business, so I started working with her, around my other schedule, in an attempt to keep up my hours.

Obviously this didn't work. Working two jobs and going to school full time was making me even less happy then I was before. What this all leads to is that on Tuesday morning I officially quit my job. The Saturday before I sat down with my parents and explained to them that working shift work and trying to search for a job and arrange interviews around my schedule was just not possible. Since my dad is going back to work in about a month, my mom has a lot more work to offer me so she gave me the go ahead to quit my job and work for her, while searching for a full time job in my field.

As excited as I am to get out of a bad situation, it's also a little sad. I've tried explaining it to C that it's like losing your childhood security blanket. As much as I bitched and complained about the place, I knew that it would always be there. On top of that, I have met so many awesome people that I can't imagine not working with and who I am going to miss terribly.

On the other side I have this huge feeling of freedom. For the first time since I was 16, I'm going to have nights and weekends off, without asking for them.

I guess change is not only inevitable, but occasionally a good thing.

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